Transcript:
Robert: I can assure to you, I can swear to you that you are not the body-mind phenomena. I can assure to you, I can swear to you that you are not the doer. That no matter what appears to be is not. No matter what experience you’re going through mentally, physically or otherwise, it is not the truth about you. The truth about you is absolute reality, parabrahman, sat-chit-ananda, pure awareness, ultimate oneness. This is what you are. Why don’t you believe me? You think you are a frail body that goes through the world for maybe seventy, eighty years and then that is the end of you, but that’s not so. You are not that body at all. That body does not even exist. It appears to exist. It appears to exist as the personal I. When you investigate the personal I you will find that there is no body, no mind, no world, no problems, no God, no universe. You are that! You are that absolute consciousness which was never born and can never die. You are that absolute reality that has always been and will always be, the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. Know who you are. Do not depend on the world for your sustenance, for your maintenance. But dive deep within, deeper than you’ve ever dove before. Deep within, deeper and deeper and you will see the truth that you are omnipresence. You are pure consciousness. This is the truth about you and there is no other truth. Accept it, be it. There is a certain question that people ask me continuously. People from this group, people I’ve never saw before that call me on the phone, people I meet in the park, homeless people, aliens, wretched people, people of all nationalities. What they ask me is this: As I am practicing atma-vichara, self-inquiry in the process will my humanhood improve. In other words what they want to know is while they’re doing this sadhana, whether it’s the I am meditation or self-inquiry, it may take weeks, months, years, will my personal life improve. If I am sick will I become healthy, if I am poor will I become rich, if I am miserable will I become peaceful so forth and so on. The way I answer this is, first tell me what you mean when you say, “Improve your humanhood?” What do you mean by that? And the answer is: I mean to make myself a better person. To get a better job. To be able to buy a new car. To be able to get rid of the cancer that is eating up me. To get a companion, a mate that is compatible with my way of thinking. Will all these things happen while I practice. We’ll discuss this for a while. This question presupposes that you are a human being and you wish to improve your humanhood. What you are really doing is building up your ego making it more powerful. What is a human being to begin with? If you looked at a human being under an electric microscope you would find something very interesting. You would see billions of molecules and if you look deeper you would find trillions of atoms, that make up the molecules. You would see space in between the atoms. If you were as small as an atom, the space between the molecules would be the equivalent distance between the planets, between the earth and mars, the earth and jupiter, the earth and the sun. There is space between the planets also. That space is consciousness. And the space out of the body is also consciousness. What I am trying to say is that there is one space and you are that space. Your body is in a state of flux. Your body is not what you think it is. It only appears to us to be solid. Just like every other thing on this earth, the chair, the radio, the rug, the wall. These things appear to be solid but they are not. What determines your body as compared to the wall is the movement of the atoms. How fast they move or how slow they move. The atoms of the body are moving at a certain speed. They become a body. But again if you see what I’m talking about you’re really space. You are not the body because the space between the atoms is larger, more than the atoms themselves. And the space becomes expanded taking up all of space. What is behind space? What causes space? What is the substratum of the space? You are, your real nature, absolute reality. So you see you are not what you appear to be. By trying to improve something that does not exist brings upon itself suffering. For you are identifying with the appearance rather than with the reality. As long as you identify with the appearance you go through all sorts of living conditions, all sorts of experiences. And you try to improve your living condition, as it were. You are wasting your time, for in this world you have to experience both sides of the coin. When you improve your human condition something happens sooner or later so that you may improve an experience the other side of the coin. For every up there is a down, for every forward there is a backward. Then who are you? Who is it that wants to improve their condition? That is the first thing that you should ask yourself. Who wants to improve the human condition? And the answer is always I do. Then “Who am I? What is the source of the I that wishes to improve the human condition?” As you begin to search for the source you will find that the I disappears. As you begin to realize the truth about yourself, that you are not the body-mind, you are not the doer, happiness ensues. This happiness comes all by itself as a result of your realization that you are not the body-mind. But you still ask, “If I’m not realized why can’t I live a total harmonious life in my illusion?” It’s impossible. Everything that is born, so-to-speak, must die. You begin to die as soon as you’re born. But what does happen to you, to the extent that you begin to know the truth, to that extent do you begin to transcend the so called human condition. In other words your body may still have cancer and you’re no longer trying to heal it of anything. You’re simply identifying with the reality. To the extent that you identify with the reality, to that extent do you no longer feel a body with cancer. So to other people you may appear to have cancer, you may appear to be deteriorating. Like Ramana Maharshi did before he left his body so-to-speak. Like Rama Krishna and many others. The people see a deteriorating body, but the Sage does not have a body to deteriorate. He just has no body. The body does not exist for him. This is the problem because when I speak of this I know a lot of you get lost. How can there be nobody when I see? Ask yourself, “Who sees? What do you see?” You see poverty, you see man’s inhumanity to man, you see this and you see that. The seer that sees has to be transcended. There has to be a seer to see these things. When you ask, “Who is the seer?” Both the seer and the object seen dissolve into the nothingness from whence they came. This means you should not accept what is seen. Let the world spin, let people go through their karma, leave things alone. Let the higher power take care of the world and universe, but you identify with the real Self. The Self that is the omnipresence. The Self that is the higher power. Know that you are that. You are no longer a limited personality. You no longer are a frail human that’s dying of cancer or experiencing lack or limitation or experiencing happiness, human happiness, or experiencing vibrant health. Even Arnold Schwarzenegger is going to waste away. He may believe in his body but he’s getting weaker as he gets older. He’s wasted all this time identifying with the weightlifting room. When he could’ve become free and identified with reality. Nobody lives forever. No situation remains the same forever. Everything ends in this world so it appears. Everything has a beginning a middle and an end. But you are not that, you have nothing to do with that picture. You are immortal, you are nirvana. You must begin today to stop judging by appearances. The more you begin to feel this the less you talk. For what is talking all about. Except to talk about the world and people and things. Think how long you’ve been talking since you were born. You started with dada, mama and you expanded your vocabulary. You thought you were doing something great, you’ve wasted your time. The more words you know the larger the ego. The less words you know the closer you are to the Self. What has the Self to say, to whom shall it talk to, itself? The Self is self-contained consciousness. Aware of itself, itself is omnipresence. So to whom shall it talk to, itself? It is perfect bliss consciousness. There need be no words, just a look, a touch, a glance is all you have to do. Yet you say, “How can I do this? I work for a living, I have to eat, I have to earn my bread and butter, I have to talk.” Don’t worry about details. If you dive within yourself and you spend most of your time thinking about the I am, practicing self-inquiry, the details will work themselves out. You must not believe that it is up to you to work out all the details of life. There is a higher power that knows where the appearance of your body is supposed to be and what work it’s supposed to do. Trust that power. You will find out one day that the power is none other…is you. That power is your Self. But until then trust the power. I like to call this power, “The current that knows the way.” It’s a beautiful power, it only knows love. It wants you to become a living embodiment of love. It wants you to merge with itself. Yet as long as you identify with the world you can never know reality. As long as you identify with your personal I, by always voicing what I feel, I feel hurt, I feel angry, I feel sick, I feel depressed, I feel happy because somebody gave me something, I feel good because I’m getting my own way. That I has got to go. The whole world, the whole universe, people places and things are attached to the I. If you follow the I to the source the whole universe will disappear. And the question arises, “Then what? If the universe disappears will I be in outer space? Will I be in a fog?” It’s a paradox. The universe disappears, yet you exist in the universe. Your body will continue going about its business but you will not be identifying with your body any longer. You will not even feel that you are in the body. But you will feel the body is in you. You will feel like a gigantic screen. Where all the items of this earth, trees, plants, flowers, bugs, murderers, lovers are all superimposed on the screen. They are on the screen and you are the screen. The screen is not in them. So it’s a misnomer to say that, “God is in me.” The body that you think you are is in God and consciousness. Just like the body you draw on the blackboard. But the body you draw on the blackboard is not the blackboard. The blackboard is self-contained and you may draw items on the blackboard and erase them and draw new items on the blackboard and erase those. That is like life going from one life to the next life, from one experience to the next experience. The whole universe is superimposed on consciousness. When you change identities and identify with consciousness everything disappears. Yet you continue experiencing not as an ego but as the Self. And what do you experience? Pure awareness. You are aware of the truth, the reality. Your body will continue its sojourn through the world doing whatever it came here for, but you will not be your body. Again this is paradoxical for you appear to be your body but you are not your body. You become a living embodiment of pure happiness, total joy and bliss. The world can no longer fool you or disturb you. You have a feeling of deep immortality. You know without words that nobody dies because nobody was born. You understand and realize without words that there is no causation for the universe. Nothing ever brought it into life. It has no cause. If it has no cause, again you ask, “Where did it come from?” And the answer is it didn’t come from anywhere. It’s like hypnosis. You are hypnotized into believing something is real that is not and to you it’s real when you come out of the hypnotic trance, you are part of the waking world again and that something that appeared real is gone. So it is with this world, it appears real, yet it’s like a dream. You wake up and the dream is finished. When you wake up out of your mortal dream the idea of body-mind, doer is also finished. Now is this teaching practical? Is finding your real nature practical? Of course it’s practical. Remember you do not become a burden on society by practicing self-inquiry and coming closer to the truth. Many people still think that they will stay home everyday and just meditate. I remind you again it doesn’t work that way. If you were meant to be active you will be active. If you were not meant to be active no matter how much you try to be active you will not be able to do anything. Again do not concern yourself with details. Simply practice everyday. Be aware everyday. See who becomes frustrated, see who feels slighted, who is hurtable, see who is trying to give a one upper-ship on somebody else, see who competes with others, see who you are. Find out the truth. Become free. It’s wonderful to realize that your real nature is parabrahman. Beyond consciousness, beyond words and thoughts, beyond human experiences of any kind. That is how you bring peace into the world. Not by trying to make up peace slogans or demonstrations, but by becoming self-realized, awakening. Then automatically your consciousness expands and people feel it and they too automatically begin to turn within. In the beginning do not concern yourself with these things whatsoever. When you awaken then see if you want to bring peace to this world, because I kid you not, there is no world to bring peace to. We are looking at things from both sides. When you still believe in your humanity you want to do good deeds, you want to bring peace to the world, make this world a better world in which to live but the further into truth you go, the more you become self-realized the more you are able to see, “I am the world. All this is the Self and I am that.” And you live a wonderful life. Again it begins as soon as you wake up in the morning. Try your best to see the fourth state of consciousness beyond waking, sleeping and dreaming. The fourth state is between sleeping and awakening. Try to catch yourself there. People tell me they try and just can’t. If you keep trying you will. That place where there is no thoughts. A place where there is no thinking of any kind. That still place, that is bliss consciousness. Before the I comes out and starts to do it’s dirty work. Just before the I wakes up ask yourself, “Where did the I come from? What was its source? Who am I?” And the last thing before you fall asleep, same situation. When all thoughts stop and you are about to sleep, catch yourself in that state and ask, “Where did the I go? The I seems to be disappearing as I fall asleep. Where is it gone? What is its source?” And yet as you sleep as you dream as you awake there appears to be another I that is the observer of you sleeping, awake and dreaming. That is the real I, that is consciousness. Actually there is only one I but as long as you identify with the body it appears to be a personal I. As you begin to become aware of the higher I the personal I simply disappears, for it never really existed. And the large I comes into play, which is pure awareness. (tape break) You will find something very interesting happening to you. You are becoming happier and happier for no reason. Your fears just melt away. Your past dissolves. The new man is born. All the guilt dissipates. You have awakened. Try it, it works. We are one big happy family here. I’m sure you have something to say or questions to ask, feel free to do so. SU: Robert I find the concepts of immortality, those in the physical and in our state of being, why have we chosen if we are immortal, why have we chosen this mortal, fearful part of this life, what is it about? R: You have never chosen it. You have to ask yourself, “Who has chosen?” and you will find out that the I that you think has chosen doesn’t exist. You never chose to be mortal. The mortality of you doesn’t really exist. It appears to exist as personal-I. As you follow the personal-I to the source, you will find that the mortal never began and the mortal never ends. There is no mortal at all. SU: So there is no mortal? (R: No.) So we are immortal? R: You are immortal. That is your nature, you appear to be mortal. It’s as if you are watching a movie and on the screen you see all of the different pictures. They cover the screen. You have no idea the screen exists, but the reason you are able to see the pictures is because of the screen. And if you try to grab the picture you’re going to grab the screen. So it is with us. We as mortals are superimposed on consciousness and we appear as mortal. It’s all part of the grand illusion. That is what is called maya. It appears to exist but it doesn’t. When you awaken you will realize that there never was a time when you were born. And there will never be a time when you cease to be. So the mortal is false. It’s an appearance. SC: Is it possible that if one does some of the things like I’ve said and there is an armor around us and the armor could be broken we could see our true Self? R: You can only go so far with that method that you explained. To go all the way comes through self-inquiry. You have to get rid of the person who breaths, as well as the breath. It’s all part of the false identification. From the breathing techniques that you just explained to us, it improves your physical status it makes you feel better as a mortal, but that is as far as it goes. To truly break away from that you have to ask yourself, “Who breaths? Who is a better mortal? Who is healthy?” It’s the ego, be rid of the ego and you’ll be free and blissful, and happy. (SC: You know as you talk and it’s true and I’ve heard this over and over, it just seems like throwing a ball against the wall, it comes back. The ball doesn’t penetrate the wall.) What you see is what you get. So if you see your stuff that you put out coming back, and it does, stop seeing. Go beyond seeing. Find out who the seer is and what is seen, they are both the same. The seer and the seen are the same. Go beyond that. SC: It’s almost like … I know I’m talking but, it’s almost like you’re talking Greek to me in that sense. Unless you understand Greek it doesn’t mean anything.) R: No it’s a little different. (laughter) For you simply have to inquire within yourself, “Who doesn’t understand?” It’s always going back to you, “Who doesn’t understand? I don’t. Well who is this I that doesn’t understand? Where does it come from? Who gave it birth? How does it originate? It seems to originate only when I open my eyes in the morning, the I begins its work. So what is its source?” As you identify with the source, the I will disappear and you will be free. SC: How did it happen to you? R: Well that is a story in lesson number four. (SC: I mean was it gradual?) No. (SC: Or like that or… (flicks fingers)) R: I was sitting in the school during high school when I was 14 years old taking a test. I’ll make the story succinct. All of a sudden I found myself disappearing, merging into consciousness, not as a body but as pure awareness itself. My body had merged, like melted, but I never went anywhere, there was no change. As consciousness, I realized that there’s no body. No body exists. There is only consciousness itself expressing itself as pure awareness. I don’t know how long it lasted but the next thing I remember is the teacher shaking me and that experience has never left me. (SC: It wasn’t a preparation like we’re doing it just happened out of the blue, I mean…) It just happened out of the blue. SS: It seems to me that there is no screen. R: There is no screen but for… (SU: Screen.) Screen, I agree with you. There is no screen, there is no consciousness, there is no self-realization, there is no reality. Then there is silence. So if there is no screen then there is no words. In order to explain these things we need illustrations and words. But you’re right, there is no screen. SN: Robert isn’t self-inquiry though a very advanced state, one should be established in concentration before that becomes effective. So when you say to find the I, abide in the I, follow it to its source. To find the I, requires one-pointedness and if that is difficult is it useful to do japa to try to have that concentration to even find the I and to inquire … to do the inquiry? R: It depends on the maturity of the person. Not everybody can do the selfinquiry, you’re right. The next best thing to do is to surrender, totally and completely to God. Give God your ego, your life, everything. You have no will of your own. And as you do that you can practice japa, mantras. Those help to make the mind one pointed and prepares you for self-inquiry. But you can know yourself where you are coming from, by the amount of attention that you can hold on self-inquiry. If it’s a little too difficult don’t worry about it, surrender completely. Surrender completely, everybody can do that, sing bhajans, do mantras. If you are sincere, whatever you do you will be led to the next step. The current that knows the way will take care of you if you are true to your Self. SN: Also isn’t there a difference between witnessing and self-inquiry? R: Oh yes. Self-inquiry is not witnessing. Witnessing is very good, it helps. To become the witness of your thoughts without trying to change them, to become the witness of everything. But when you practice self-inquiry you ask, “Who is the witness?” The witness is still attached to I. The witness ultimately has to go and then there is pure awareness. (SN: It seems that in witnessing the thoughts still come and go but in inquiry if you get into the state of abiding in the I there is almost a cessation of thought, there is only I am-ness.) When you abide in the I you are I am-ness, itself. When you watch your thoughts you are still the ego. SH: So the thoughts have to come and have to cease completely before that step can occur? R: Thoughts have to cease completely. There is no one left to think. There is nowhere from which the thoughts arise. And there is no place where the thoughts go. They just cease as if they never existed to begin with. (SH: Which is true.) Yes. SS: But they appear again? R: To whom do they appear again? (SS: Consciousness I think?) Thoughts cannot appear to consciousness. (SS: To whom can they appear to then?) To no one. (SS: To no one but as I say, but they come out of this consciousness they are received and then come out.) They do not come out of consciousness. (SS: They are consciousness.) Consciousness is self-contained. Nothing can really come out of consciousness. (SS: Is it the self-contained, is it this I, is it this ego?) No it’s self-contained as I-am, not as the ego. (SS: It’s everything.) The ego is an illusion. The ego never existed. Consciousness cannot give birth to an ego? (SS: How did this arise? If you become consciousness and you become … and you are silent. The silence ends and it seems that these thoughts appear. They just appear.) If you are in the true silence then no thoughts will appear. (SS: Ever?) Ever. They will just be spontaneous. They will appear to keep your bodily functions going. (SS: But even if they are spontaneous they’re there?) They are just to keep you going as a body. But that doesn’t exist at all. That is an illusion. SC: Do thoughts come to you? R: As I function, thoughts appear to come. I raise my hand, I talk. I eat. So the thoughts are there doing those things but they do not go further than my nose. SH: Why do you let them go that far? (R: I don’t.) Good. (students laugh) R: I am not that. But that is what appears to happen. I can sit here and tell you that I have no body, even if you are looking at me. There is no mind there is no appearance of a body, even. Yet you tell me, “No you’re wrong I see it, so it must be true.” But if you catch yourself when you say, “I see it.” You’ll find the culprit, I. I sees it. Find out who the I is that sees the body. The body and the I are attached to each other. If you get rid of one you get rid of the other. See life is like an optical illusion. I go back to the illustration of the sky is blue. You look at the sky and you say, “What a beautiful blue it is.” Not today. But if you investigate you will find out there is no sky and there is no blue. It’s an optical illusion. It’s like the snake in the rope, which is another illustration. If you are in the dark and you see a rope coiled up you’ll think it’s a snake and you’ll get fear and you’re frightened to death. But when you turn on the light you see it’s only a rope. Once you discover this you can never be fooled again. SS: But that was a rope? R: There was a rope but it was not a snake. (SS: But there was a rope or you wouldn’t have seen the snake?) (students laugh) You thought the rope was the snake, but you find out upon investigation that it was not a snake it was only a rope. So in the same instance, you think I am the body but upon investigation when the light is turned on in your consciousness you will see that there is no body. There is only consciousness. There never was a body. (SS: Where does the rope come from? Is the rope the Self? Where did the rope come from?) The rope is just an illustration the rope is just there. The rope you understand, it appears to be a snake to some people and frightens them. So your body and your affairs sometimes appear frightening, but that is just like a snake it doesn’t exist, it’s a rope. You are pure consciousness and you are bright and shining. SE: What if you think it’s a rope and it’s really a snake? (students laugh) R: Well you’ve got a problem? SH: Then you get death. (laughter) (R: Then you really have to work on yourself.) SY: If the sky being blue is really an illusion, why do we all share the same illusion? Why can’t we see the sky, different people see the sky in different colors. R: It’s like saying, why don’t we all have the same dream? We dream individually. No two people have the same dream. In the same way no two people see the same thing the same way. You see the sky is blue in different ways. But collectively we see the sky is blue. This is called the grand illusion. We all come from the same oneness, the same delusion. There is only one. There are not many. So the collective consciousness of humanity appears to see the same thing because it’s coming out of the same bag. When you destroy the illusion you no longer see the fake sky, you see reality. You no longer see yourself as a human being. You see yourself as the universe and the sky, the moon, the stars are all taking place within yourself. SY: What is it when you can see something actually change shape like right in front of your eyes, like a persons head. For instance you’re looking at a persons head and it can change into something ancient, like another ancient person and it can change into different shapes and forms and colors? R: It means you have been taking too much LSD. (loud laughter) (SY: No I mean without any LSD, without any drugs.) Well somehow your brain has become a little warped (laughter again) and you’re seeing all these different things. The idea is not to see these things. There could be many reasons, hallucinations, too much thinking. There are many reasons why we see things change and shapes change. But the truth is we have to go beyond that and you have to ask yourself, “To whom does this come? Who sees these things?” It’s all part of the personal I. Everything we’re talking about is part of the personal I. Shapes, people, places, things, occult visions, astrology, numerology, it’s all part of the personal I. As long as we get stuck in that scene we have to repeat it again and again karmically, so it appears. Until we get loose of the personal I and we become the Self. So all these things, visions, dreams, everything is part of the personal I. SF: Robert, in the illustration of the rope and the snake how do you explain within that context, how do you explain the rope? R: The rope is an illustration of reality. (SF: As the Self or something…?) As reality, as the Self. The rope exists but the snake does not. (SF: Uh-huh. Right.) So when you see the snake you have fear but when you turn on the light or when you awaken in consciousness, you see the rope. You see yourself as the way you are pure, pure awareness. So the rope illustrates the Self. (SF: Right. So if we don’t know the Self it’s a real mystery?) The Self is a mystery when you don’t know it, that’s right. (SF: Until more or less…) R: Even if you realize it’s a mystery you’re on the right track. When it makes you think about it, it makes you say to yourself, “There must be something else than what I appear to be. This can’t be all to me than there is. Going to sleep at night getting up in the morning, going to work, watching TV, there must be something else.” That is the beginning of wisdom. And then you start asking, “What is this something else? Who is it? Is it God? I can think of God. Who thinks? What kind of God am I thinking of? Where did these thoughts come from?” And then one day you’ll say, “I think them. Wow this is amazing. All these thoughts that I’ve been looking where they come from, I is the one that thinks them. Therefore if I eliminate the I the other thoughts will go also and I’ll be free.” So you spend the rest of your life with self-inquiry, eliminating the I. SG: So Robert the whole thing is a full blown hallucination. It’s what we’re experiencing. If you know it’s hallucination it gets you out, moving out of it? (R: Yes, of course.) It has that quality like life beyond LSD but you can’t quite get yourself off the trip? But you know somehow… R: …there’s got to be an answer. (SG: Yeah but somehow this is sort of unreal.) And the answer is always within yourself. And if you inquire deep within yourself the answer will come. SC: It just struck me that, how about these monks that live up in Tibet are they doing the same thing, self-inquiry? Sitting in meditation, living an austere life? Is that their motive? R: It depends what sect they belong to and what they are doing. I have no idea what they are doing up there? (SC: I mean not only in Tibet, but India and around the world?) There is no need to go to a monastery. For you have to take yourself with you. And if you can’t think now about your real Self it will be worse when you go to a monastery. (SC: I didn’t mean that I meant the men who were in those monasteries.) Who knows where they are coming from, they are probably all reading playboy. (students laugh) (SC: That’s a big one!) We have no idea what they are doing. Forget about them. (laughter) Find out what you’re doing. SK: Robert, it seems like in the practice of self-inquiry that there is a different kind of spectrum of thoughts, there are random thoughts and there are highly charged emotional thoughts like anger and there are perhaps things that are very close to having perception. Like you’re kind of doing self-inquiry and there is a loud disruptive noise right near you and there are semantic perceptions like a pain in the body. Those all essentially are handled the same way as far as self-inquiry is concerned? R: Everything is handled the same way. (SK: But it seems to be all the same type of thing but the experience is different somehow?) It’s all attached to the I. The difference is in your mind. (SK: So when some of those things seem more disruptive to handle when doing selfinquiry and when they persist is it best when you can and something will get…) The disruption is the best teacher you can ever have because the disruption makes you see that you have to go beyond it. (SK: Well let’s take the most disruptive can be physical pain so if you were saying, “Who am I?” and then it’s there again. Do you go to “Who am I?” again?) No if you have physical pain, you should ask yourself, “To whom does the pain come?” Do it that way. “Who experiences the pain?” Again, “I do.” Then you say, “Who am I?” (SK: And so it benefits…) It slowly does benefit, of course. (SK: As diligently as possible.) R: Practicing “Who am I?” for the average person is really the greatest psychotherapy that was ever invented for it gets rid of emotional problems, by inquiring, “To whom does the problem come?” And then you realize that you are not the problem, I is. So where did the I come from? It didn’t come from anywhere, that is the realization you come to. It never was born, nothing gave it birth, it’s a liar. Then you’re free. SN: But “Who am I?” is not a mental process? R: No, and it’s also not a mantra, it’s simply inquiry. You’re inquiring. See what happens to the mind when you inquire what it is, it gets weaker and weaker until it disappears. That is the only way to annihilate the mind. By investigating it and realize that it doesn’t exist. (SN: When you say to investigate it, it sounds like a mental process again?) No you’re simply looking at your mind and asking, “To whom does it come?” It’s true you are using a little of your mind to get rid of your mind. That’s the only instrument you have got to use. When you investigate your mind with your mind, it dissolves, it dissipates. It becomes transcended. (SN: Yeah but the idea of abiding in the I seems to give a different feeling than investigating the I?) Abiding in the I is the same as investigating the I. You’re abiding in the I, that means you’re watching the I. You are holding on to the I. You’re looking at the I most carefully. And as you keep investigating the I, following the I thread to its source, the I just is gone. SF: So Robert there is a sort of a sequence in self-inquiry. First comes the “Who am I?” That’s number one. Number two, the thoughts slow down the mind tends to dissipate or disappear little by little and abiding in the Self may or may not happen, but that’s not my concern. I just keep on self-inquiring and the most that I could hope, if I hope for something is that my thoughts slow down and abidance in the Self may or may not come up, it’s not my concern, again… R: What you’re saying is true. Nothing is your concern. You should have no concern whatsoever. (SF: I just keep asking myself, “Who am I?”) This is a real radical teaching, it happens differently to different people. There are some people just by asking, “To whom does this come?” And there is sort of a flash and everything is gone and they’re home free. There are other people who have to carry it through and do what you said. Don’t make it a practice with number one, number two, number three, number four. (SF: Oh that’s for explaining it, sort of.) R: Yeah, but when you’re doing it yourself let it come naturally do not force it. For instance, when you react to a condition and you catch yourself, do not force anything to happen or to take the place of the reaction. In a gentle calm way, observe what happened and something within you will say, “Who reacted” and something else will come and say, “I did. Then who is this I who reacted? Where did it come from? What is its source?” You do everything in a calm gentle way. You may have to go through all the steps and you may not have to go through all the steps. Do not have any preconceived ideas about this. Have no concepts. Simply allow whatever happens to happen. (Music played with Mary singing) R: We have a lot of prashad today. We have to eat until we bust. Do we have any announcements? Ed. SE: Easter, next Sunday is Easter and at six o clock, we’re going to have it here, we’re going to have a bhandara. And one more interesting thing is for some of those who feel doubts from time to time, one of the persons that recently has requested Robert’s talks is Jean Dunn who has written … is a student of Nisargadatta, written the “Seeds Of Consciousness” and “Prior To Consciousness” she said, his talks are fascinating and she gives them to her students and her friends up there in … where she lives in Vacaville, just thought you might like to know that. R: Is Vacaville not a prison? (SE: Yeah she is in prison there.) (laughter) SL: Also there is a list on the table that I put up there for the bhandara and if you could just put down your name and what you’re bringing so we have an idea… (tape ends)